Hi Juanetta,
You are not alone, with a disrespectful child. I have three children. The oldest one is now 16 years old. At the time he was 15. I searched, for any kind of help to control my teenage son. I was married and he had a great stepfather, but then he left us for a woman 10 years younger, (go figure!).
His biological father lives in Indiana, and has problems, he is on SSI, with three children and 2 step children. He has never been there for our son.
So here I am left raising my son on my own. I moved in with a boyfriend, due to being finacally BROKE! That made matters worse, because My son, could not stand him. The boyfriend was pretty much an idiot, who only cared about me and my 5 year old daughter. Anyhow, I asked the school for help, searched the internet for maybe a boot camp, something to give him some structure, so he did not end up in and out of jail the rest of his life. Well, the schools could not help me much, and I had to wait till he was 16 to get him in "Job Corp", which BTW, is AWSOME!
So, my son spent the night at his friends house, I picked him up, because we had to go the next day to turn in our paper work, 50 miles from our home, to get him in Job Corp. Well, he said, he smoked 2 joints, while at his friends house. I got so mad! I said are you crazy?!! You know they do drug testing! He said, yeah I know, thats why I did it!, "cuz I want to go live with my friend!". Well I said get out of the truck right now, and were finishing these papers, hopefully, we can still get you in! He said "NO", I grabed him by his shirt, and went to get him out of the truck, he went to swinging on me, and so my boyfriend at the time called the law. Well It took ONE WHOLE HOUR, before they got there, Son was running off, from the house. I talked to him in the field for that hour, and I said you need help, and so do I. Well Law came (Louisiana), they didnt know what to do with him. He denied hitting me, then admit to it. They took him to the jail, but due to us not having a Juvinal facility, the Corner Put a hold on him. They transported him to the hospital. The hospital told me I have one hour to go back to my home and get enough clothes for me and my son for 3 days. We were going to have to wait till a physcoligist came to evaulate him. While I went to go get clothes, I came back. The E.R. Doctor spoke to my son, and my son minuplated the E.R. Doc. The doctor said, you need to take him home! (oh yeah by the way, he threatend to burn the trailer down, and cut my boyfriends throat), I said "NO", yall need to help me with this situation! Next thing I know, Im getting hand cuffs put on me, and went to jail, for crimmanl neglect on a minor! Now he is in the states care, because he did not want to come back home, and live with me and the boyfriend. (I didnt want to live with boyfriend either, but we had nowhere else to live!), (my family is all 1500 miles away. So, he lives with a foster parent, for a short time, then he desides he dosent like that, and i kept saying he is allready signed up for job corp, Please Place him there. Well he has been placed there since Jan 2010. I since left the boyfriend, and found a friend that I have known for 8 years. I moved in here, and have been livin here, my son is happy, where I am living. We went to court the other day, My son got on the stand, and stated he wanted to be returned to my custody, as I also did. Since, him being enrolled in Job Corp, he has Changed TREMONDULSY, for the better, and so have I. Now, I am cleaning a trailer out, that I will be moving in, In about a month. The Judge said we need "ME", to wait another 3-6 months, and then evaulate to see, If I can prove and show, I have my own home and can support him.
Once, I do that, He will still remain in Job Corp, living on campus, but able to come home on weekends, holidays, etc. JOB CORP, really saved my son, from a life of him going down the wrong road. Now he has is GED, and is taking a welding Class.
But, the bad thing, is... I am being punished for ASKING for help with my child. I just had court friday, on arringment, Luckly, they gave me more time to come up with an attorney. As, I could be sitting in Jail right now.
Hang in there, and see about Boot camps, etc. I know when your child is 15 or 16 they can live on campus at job corp, where they provide, schooling, councling, just all kinds of programs, that are FREE! They have a nice dorm room, and HAVE TO OBEY!!! So, Check it out!
